As the impeachment inquiry into President Trump’s dealings with Ukraine proceeds, the nation is embroiled in a discussion of Trump’s laundry list of questionable behavior. No one enjoys being called names, regardless of the veracity of the statement--just ask my nephew, who is indeed a poopyhead--and Donald Trump is no different. Trump took to Twitter this morning with a foolproof plan to escape the negative spotlight.
“Can anyone get me that Memory Erasing Thing from Men in Black?” he tweeted. “It would be a Huge Help to our Country and the American People to go back to remembering the Great Times! @willsmith @TommyLeeJones @EdgarTheBug”
With respect to Trump’s previous presidential asks, the attempted acquisition of a device with the intention of wiping the last several years’ worth of memories from, at the very least, the entire United States population is surprisingly innocuous. However, he’ll have to rely on word of mouth to get his message to the intended parties, since @willsmith is the CEO of a VR animation company; @TommyLeeJones is an inactive account; and Edgar the Bug is a fictional character.
Subscribe to our weekly newsletter
Any resemblance of anything on this site to anything else
in the history of ever is purely a fabrication of your own mind. The authors
of this website are idiots. Do not rely on anything they say or write as a
guide in any useful direction in your or anyone else's lives (including