2019 Threatens To Turn Around If All We're Going To Do Is Keep Complaining

LIFESTYLE | September 5th, 2019 1:18 PM

There are fewer than four months remaining in 2019, but the unit of time signifying our planetary home’s periodic lap around an unfathomably large, flaming sphere has had enough. First there wasn’t enough Spongebob in the Super Bowl halftime show. Then one single episode of Game of Thrones managed to ruin eight seasons of unbelievably high-quality content that allowed everyone to forget about all their responsibilities and the atrocities of the world for a few months each year. And now--heaven forbid!--Tom Holland’s Spider-Man may no longer be in the exalted MCU.

The year has had to listen to more than 247 days of whining over trivialities and has made its first threat to just turn around right now and take us all back to 2018. Compared to years past, making it to September before invoking such a threat is a feat in itself. 2018 barely made it to March, and during the Dark Ages there were several years that actually did turn around and head back to the previous year.

It remains to be seen how much gravity this current threat has. We’ll be watching closely for any updates, but historically we shouldn’t worry until we hear the year say, “Don’t make me come back there!”

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